Grrl Power #1414 – Smaug, minus “a”
I may have mentioned this before, but for some reason, jokes about thinks being load-bearing always land with me. Probably because the only ones I’ve heard are absurdist. I think Brooklyn 99 did one about a balloon arch being load-bearing. Knees are, evolutionarily speaking, load-bearing. All bones are, really. Maybe not the skull, or the lower mandible. I suppose that depends on how you define “load.” But knees are inarguably load-bearing, so my little joke meets my own standard for being absurdist, therefore, I made myself laugh with this one.
Also, not to keep patting myself on the back, but “the most structurally reinforced of women’s knees” (which is an awkward sentence, but I think it’s grammatically correct?) also makes me laugh, because, yes, of course, there are such things as knee braces and in the advanced galaxy, powered armor, but the first thing my mind conjures is something like a woman wearing 6 pairs of pantyhose, or some kind of stocking and garter and flying buttress affair.
In some settings, dragon fire would be just some napalm-ish goo stored in a gland and it’s lit by the dragon clicking their teeth together when they have some flint stuck between their molars. That sort of biological dragon can account for the acid and chlorine breathers, but doesn’t allow for the kind that breath lightning or “cold.” In magical dragon settings, there’s probably more to the breath weapons than some goo in a gland. So dragons would probably have a name for it that sounds cool. Soulfire was the best I could come up with. Which probably happened at a Dragon council meeting, and the Red and Gold and Magma dragons were like “I guess “SoulFire” is the best we can come up with.” And all the other dragons who breathe cold or tornadoes or avalanches or starlight or whatever were all “No! It must be inclusive! EnergyForge!” “What are we? Dwarves?” “How about DragonCore!” “Ug, that sounds like an exercise trend for douchey nobles and High Elves.” “Okay, fine, SoulFire it is, but must we do intercaps?” “The Time Dragon says it will be easier to Duck Duck Go, whatever that means.”
Kobold Sydney vote incentive! Is finally done!
So… you know, check it out. Oh, and as usual, Patreon has a scales only version.
Double res version will be posted over at Patreon. Feel free to contribute as much as you like.
when do we get to the part where she proves him very very wrong? lmao
When DaveB get the jokes out of his system and want an action scene.
I mean, the dragon isn’t completely out of line. He’ll have to ask Cora a couple of times to check his math and repeat that ‘Egoma’ can still take him, and if she keeps saying that, he’ll probably get close enough to the truth eventually, to wit, that Egoma is not a Stygan wandering master.
Honestly, the fact that Cora said that at all is pretty clearly blowing ‘Egoma’s’ cover. I’m hoping Cora had a good reason for why Maxima should wear her Egoma disguise to this meeting, but shouldn’t bother keeping her dragon-slaying abilities secret.
Hypothetical non magic cold breathing dragon could have two glands, both spraying a different chemical that only meet just outside the mouth due to the angle of things. That when mix are a highly endothermic reaction.Something like a better version of ammonium chloride and Barium Hydroxide
As how a “biological dragon” would breathe cold.
The solution is to breathe an endothermic mix or something colder than its surrounding.
Actually kinda comparable to heath and flames.
flames and heath are spread by spreading material undergoing an exothermic reaction.
Do the same with an endothermic reaction and you’re done.
water and ammonium nitrate should do the trick
For a lightning breathing dragon one would need to prepare and aim the path of lightning, since lightning moves through preionised air this possible by preionising a path and thus determining the path of least resistance.
The best method I can think of is a low phased laser(yes, this has been tested in military applications).
The best mechanism I can think of for this is using the leaving air from the beast to focus the light in a co2 laser fashion.