Before you go scrambling to google, “obstroculous” is a word Mrs. Slocombe of “Are You Being Served” made up. Based on context, it means “obstructive” or “being difficult” as in a person, not like a math problem. There is a word, “Obstropulous” meaning “noisy or rough, especially in resisting restraint or control,” and arguably, Mrs. Slocombe might have been saying that, but to me it’s funnier that she’s trying to sound fancy, but is doing it with a made-up word. Yes, yes. All words are made up. Like “matmass,” apparently. What we know for sure is that HenchWench watched “Are You Being Served” and is convinced Mrs. Slocombe said “obstroculous.”

The speed of sound in water is 3316 MPH or 5336 km/hr so it is almost 4.5 times faster than in air. The source I found that states this doesn’t take water pressure into account, and the speed of sound varies depending on altitude/barometric pressure, so I imagine the above figure is for a single additional atmosphere of pressure, which I think is like 37-ish feet. So yeah, Max is unhappy at the moment. It’s actually a little silly she’s going that fast underwater, and I debated changing this, but I ultimately decided to leave it in so you guys would have something extra to talk about. I suspect moving this quickly through water would have some additional effects, like vaporizing a massive amount of it in your wake or something. I’m not sure anyone knows what really would happen, as it would be insanely difficult to test it. Probably the only thing that has moved that quickly underwater is a meteor.

I came up with this page, imagining that the Hudson or East River or the Upper Bay, or wherever HenchWench portaled them to, are like 300 feet deep. Something that would be actually be pretty disorienting. Of course, getting zapped into any depth of water under about 15 feet at night would be pretty disorienting. Anyway, most of the rivers around New York are like 30-60 feet deep, which is really surprising to me. Parts of it are as deep as 160 feet, but really, a river is only as deep as its shallowest point if you’re trying to sail it.

I think that’s the Brooklyn Bridge Max is popping out by. The interwebs say the water around there is between 24′ and 108.’ So I guess HenchWench has done some underwater scouting for a good emergency bail spot?

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